Helping Your LGBTQ+ Loved One with Depression
What is involved in helping your LGBTQ+ loved one with depression? LGBTQ+ individuals experience unique and pervasive challenges that put them at greater risk for mental health conditions like depression. In fact, LGBTQ+ people are 2.5 times more likely to experience depression than the general population. They are also less likely to receive effective, compassionate care, due to systemic inequities within the healthcare system. What can you do as they face stigma, prejudice, discrimination, and issues of access to care?
There is a factor that makes a huge difference – and it involves you. Having familial support significantly reduces the mental health risks that affect LGBTQ+ individuals. Whether from a biological, adoptive, or chosen family, the support of loved ones is associated with a variety of positive outcomes, including improved mental health, academic functioning, and socio-economic status.
Families for Depression Awareness Co-Executive Director Susan Weinstein had the opportunity to speak with two LGBTQ+ mental health experts, Dr. Alex Keuroghlian and Dr. Amir Ahuja. In these interviews, they talked about challenges facing LGBTQ+ individuals living with mental health conditions. Here are some key takeaways from these interviews, including strategies for helping and supporting your LGBTQ+ loved ones with depression.
Stressors and Barriers to Care Affecting the LGBTQ+ Population
We interviewed Dr. Alex Keuroghlian, an Associate Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard University and the Director of the Division of Education and Training at the Fenway Institute, a community healthcare center serving the LGBTQ+ community.
In this interview, Dr. Keuroghlian emphasized the importance of familial support for LGBTQ+ mental health as a key to helping your loved one who identifies as LGBTQ+. He talked about the stressors that LGBTQ+ individuals face daily. Harassment, discrimination, and acts of violence are, unfortunately, common experiences for LGBTQ+ people. These traumas are often internalized as shame, which can interfere with relationships, emotion regulation, and overall mental health.
Dr. Keuroghlian also discussed the barriers to treatment that members of the LGBTQ+ community face. Most healthcare providers have not had LGBTQ+ cultural competency training in their medical education, so they are not informed about this population’s unique issues. In addition, LGBTQ+ people are not well represented on medical boards and other advisory committees. This reduces the likelihood of medical care and practice being inclusive and sensitive to the needs of LGBTQ+ clients and patients. All of these factors affect access to and the quality of care for LGBTQ+ individuals. To help your loved one in dealing with LGBTQ+ care issues, let your loved one lead and be prepared to actively participate and advocate.
Watch the interview here.
The Importance of Inclusivity and “Found Families”
We also interviewed Dr. Amir Ahuja. He is the Director of Psychiatry at the Los Angeles LGBTQ Center, president of the Association of LGBTQ+ Psychiatrists, and a psychiatrist in private practice in California and New Jersey.
As a person of color and a member of the LGBTQ+ community, Dr. Ahuja has experienced firsthand the “double discrimination” faced by individuals who belong to multiple marginalized groups. He emphasizes the importance of “found families,” people to whom you may not be biologically related but who accept and support all aspects of your identity.
How Families Can Help Their LGBTQ+ Loved Ones with Depression and Mental Well-Being
Supporting an LGBTQ+ person who is also living with depression is both challenging and rewarding. The responsibilities of caregiving can feel overwhelming at times. However, LGBTQ+ individuals who enjoy the support of friends and family are less likely to experience symptoms of depression and less likely to attempt suicide. Here are Dr. Ahuja’s tips for supporting LGBTQ+ loved ones’ mental health and helping when they live with depression.
1. Learn about LGBTQ+ issues
Educate yourself about LGBTQ+ terminology, issues, and experiences. There are a variety of excellent online resources, including PFLAG and the Family Acceptance Project. Of course, the best source of information might be your loved one!
2. Listen, don’t judge
Your loved one might hesitate to talk about their experiences due to internalized shame or fear of judgment. You can help them feel more comfortable by setting aside any preconceived notions, asking open-ended questions, and resisting the urge to provide opinions or advice. Instead, validate your loved one’s feelings and experiences and let them know that you are there for them.
3. Consider your own biases
Take some time to reflect on any beliefs, attitudes, and prejudices you may hold about sexual orientation and gender identity. Consider the societal influences that may have shaped your perspective and be willing to challenge any stereotypes or misconceptions you might have.
4. Show support and unconditional love
While there are many ways to show love and acceptance, there are certain imperatives for creating an affirming environment for an LGBTQ+ individual. First and foremost, use their preferred name and pronouns. Speak out against prejudice and stigma, both within your family and in the broader community. Attend LGBTQ+ events or participate in activities that celebrate diversity. Acknowledge the challenges your loved one faces. Celebrate their victories, both big and small. Above all, let them know that you love them for who they are and will always support them.
5. Help your loved one connect with an LGBTQ+-friendly provider
Because LGBTQ+ individuals face unique health challenges, it’s important to find a provider who is knowledgeable about these issues. This online directory allows you to search for LGBTQ-affirming therapists, physicians, and other healthcare providers in your geographic area.
6. Practice self-compassion and self-care
Supporting a loved one who is living with depression can be emotionally taxing, so don’t forget to take care of yourself! Caregiving is a demanding role, so seek support when needed. Practice regular self-care, whether through engaging in activities that you enjoy or seeking therapy (or both!). By prioritizing self-compassion and self-care, you can continue to provide effective and empathetic support to your LGBTQ+ loved one.
Dr. Ahuja has partnered with Janssen on the Depression Looks Like Me project to increase the inclusivity of LGBTQ+ and minority populations in campaigns for depression awareness.
Watch the interview here.
Although there are a variety of ways for helping your LGBTQ+ loved one with depression, the key is being genuinely accepting and caring. Having you walking with them as they navigate the path to mental wellness can make all the difference for them.
Also check out these resources to help your LGBTQ+ loved ones with depression.